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Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

First Shutdown Friday (hopefully the first of many) salutations from Happy -- and Civilly Disobedient -- Larryville…home of the “FY, TW Festival”, GN!

I was tickled to see this in the overnight mailbag:

 photo image001_zps6a68843e.jpg

I surmise the vehicle owner ran out of room to include worthy Republicans. 😉

I also hope that whomever loaned Weepy Boner a spine will let him keep using it for another few days (or more). Even so, I expect him to fold at any moment…it’s his nature; it’s what he does.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

Oh, Mac…heh!

“Dewey have this book listed in our card LOLcatalog??”

*Flees*

Just Sven
Editor
11 years ago

Good morning!

The winds are here and blowing harder than Paris Hilton!

Like you Fatwa, I’m happy to see this shutdown last as long as it can. Govt is broke, just not for the reasons those in charge think, so anything that mucks them up, Im in favor of.

Adobe had a massive security breach last night; changing my account and some other passwords. Not happy about that.

Paddy O'Furnijur
Editor
11 years ago

Good morning, Gerbil Nation!
Good morning, Fatwa!

Obviously the young lady in the thread pic doesn’t know that those card cabinets have pull-out shelves so you can remove the drawer, place it on the shelf, and search standing up.

Let’s hope the Sven Mountain Redoubt fares well in the winds over the next couple of days.

Paddy O'Furnijur
Editor
11 years ago

Oh, hai, Sven!
I was RabBiT typing.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

Hai, Sven and Paddy!

Adobe had a massive security breach last night…

I didn’t know they were part of the ACA. 😉

Hope your accounts are secure; ditto teh Mountain Redoubt.

Just Sven
Editor
11 years ago

Thanks, guys. The worse of this event begins this afternoon through Saturday. Might just cut out of work early today to keep an eye on things.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist
Reply to  Just Sven

May you be able to do just that…and may that turn out to be utterly unnecessary (IYKWIMAITTYD).

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

Happy 100th Birthday to the U.S. Income Tax Code…all 73,608 pages of it (as of 2012).

May it have NO happy returns. (Unintentional pun left extant.)

BTW…that’s more than 147 reams of paper. And tens of millions of taxpayer reamings each and every year. Yay!

[Insert goatse pic here]

Edited to add fake goatse pic:


“If I could find my keys, we could drive out!”

Just Sven
Editor
11 years ago

That’s funny. But you should be ashamed of yourself. But it’s still funny.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

It appears the National Park Service has quadrupled-down on stupid fascist today by wiring the barricades at the WWII monument. Apparently, not a single one of those goons -- whose salaries we pay -- had the balls to stand-up and say, “This is wrong!”

For anyone who wonders how unpleasant chaps like the Nazis can come to power, this is a textbook example…cowardice in the face of relatively small matters.

You can clearly see the barricade company name.

*Dials phone*

Addendum: I just spoke with an individual there who claimed they sold those barricades to NPS several years ago. He said they are aware of the PR issue and are in the process of noting that fact on their website.

joeschmo1of3
Admin
11 years ago

I was just informed that Fatwa did something wrong. I just see “wrongness” here. Heh.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

Hey, Joe!

I am completely unsurprised that you’re capable of discriminating between “wrong” and “wrongness”. 😉

Just got back from running a couple of errands, including fetching a couple of spicy Chick-fil-A sammies for GoodWifeK and me.

“Mmmmmm…taste teh hate!”™

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

Hi, Mac!

Sssshhhhhhh…don’t give Brenda any ideas; you know she’s a Bad Gerbil.

joeschmo1of3
Admin
11 years ago

Hey Mac! Hey Fatwa!

As a PSA, I will say that if there is going to be any extra discipline to be served out, please warm up first, and take some practice swings.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist
Reply to  joeschmo1of3

Always good advice, because *mumble*.

joeschmo1of3
Admin
11 years ago

I’m a simple geek. I like to keep my nerd slapping hand strong.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist
Reply to  joeschmo1of3

Don’t forget about your nerd stick.

joeschmo1of3
Admin
11 years ago

That wand looks well… used. Eww. Heh.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist
Reply to  joeschmo1of3

I probably ought not have bought it used from someone in YouJean.

*Flees again*

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist
Reply to  Mac

I think I almost deserved that…almost.

Just Sven
Editor
11 years ago
Reply to  Mac

Who’s he waving at?

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist
Reply to  Just Sven

You nearly made me choke on my dinner; good thing I have a keyboard skin.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

Michael Ramirez does it yet again:

Just Sven
Editor
11 years ago

Quite the windstorm blowing outside. Quite the mess. No fires tho so everything is good. Power has been intermittent.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist
Reply to  Just Sven

Glad there’re no fires; hope it remains that way and that the power stays on.

Paddy O'Furnijur
Editor
11 years ago

I leave you boys alone for a few hours and look at the trouble you get into!
I don’t know if we’ll ever get the stain out of the shavings!

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

I am unrepentant.

Let’s just put fresh shavings down, m’kay?

Paddy O'Furnijur
Editor
11 years ago

I think we’ll have to -- I don’t think one of these will do the job.

Just Sven
Editor
11 years ago

Good to see Joe stopping on by.

Just Sven
Editor
11 years ago

So at work they’ve reorganized the office areas. I sit in a corner ‘cube’ area with like chest high walls and open on 2.5 sides. Directly in front of me and across an aisle is a director. Sharing the other side and a half of my ‘cube’ is a brand spankin’ new Sr manager. In back of me and across another aisle is a brand new VP. I now report to the new manager who reports to the director who reports to the VP. It’s not an ideal comfortable work area. If I fart, one of the three is sure to hear it. And they will frown with disapproval.

I get bored at times. I sneak some looks around and if no one is there, I try some blogs on the intertubes. Security has almost everything that I want to read blocked. That’s a sports site; no entry. That’s entertainment; no entry. That’s political; no entry. That’s Paris Hilton; entry but not for you. One of the few sites that isnt blocked, don’t ask me why, is our beloved wheel. So the other day, I minimize the browser so that it’s about 3″ square and I get on the wheel. Scroll down, chuckle, scroll down. A voice in back of me (sneaky bastard) says “Hey! Is that the New York Times?” It’s the VP and he’s spied something that for whatever reason reminds him of the Times. Uh, no, I say. He leans over me for a closer look. “Tech Squeak, what’s that?” “Uh, it’s a tech writing and coding site” I say. Oh. Disappointed. And walks away.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist
Reply to  Just Sven

Heh re teh anecdote; not-so-heh re teh farting / reading situation.

Tech Squeak…har!

“Uh, it’s a tech writing and coding site”

Well-played, sir.

Paddy O'Furnijur
Editor
11 years ago

Tech Squeak!

Why couldn’t the webpage get a girl? Because it had no <style>.

Q: Why was the XHTML bird an invalid? A: Because it wasn’t nested properly.

Just Sven
Editor
11 years ago

Thanks, Paddy. Helping to keep my story alive.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

Does anybody know if Jerry’s currently in Florida?

Steve Orville Clemons was at the drive-thru window of a Wildwood McDonald’s when the cashier “turned to him to give him his change.” At that point, the woman realized that Clemons was sans pants and was pleasuring himself.

I’m glad my middle name’s not Orville. Or Cletus.

Just Sven
Editor
11 years ago

You always wonder about that secret sauce on the Big Macs.

Paddy O'Furnijur
Editor
11 years ago
Reply to  Just Sven

…and the cream-filled doughnuts at Dunkin’ Donuts.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist
Reply to  Just Sven

 photo shatslap.gif

😉 😉

Paddy O'Furnijur
Editor
11 years ago

Is that William Shatner, beating his Captain?

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

He was an enterprising lad.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

Speaking of secret sauce, I still find this tune pretty amazing:

Just Sven
Editor
11 years ago

Another work story. There’s one smoking section at this place, out back by the trash cans and next to a smelly wash. On a breezy day you can smell the dumped out cooking oil from the Chinese restaurant down the street. It’s nice.

Anyhow, there’s a goodly number of smokers here and an equal number of vapers or whatever you call them. Anyhow, I went out for a smoke a couple of weeks ago and there’s this guy that I know, about my age, works in purchasing. Nice guy, always good for a story or a joke or just casual conversation.

How’s it going?

Us, so so. You’ll never guess what I just did. I’m in a status meeting with all the managers and we are running down this list of parts for this new project and they go around the table and get to me. I got one part on the list and they ask if there’s any problems and when it will be in. Now I’ve sat in this meeting every week for the last 6 months or so and I’ve been giving a status on this part for the last three weeks. It’s no big deal-I’ve been working it.

So what do I say? “I’ll place the purchase order next week; delivery is good but I want to Jew him down a bit more on the price.” And he shakes his head.

I ask: Did anyone notice?

Him: They ALL noticed. There’s just silence around the table. I havent used that expression since I was a kid like 40 years ago. I don’t know what happened; it’s like I just hit a wall in my mind and I couldnt find the word ‘negotiate’ and out popped ‘Jew’.

OK, I had to laugh, but I havent seen him around since that day.

Paddy O'Furnijur
Editor
11 years ago
Reply to  Just Sven

Jooos -- is there nothing they can’t do?