Teh Squeaky Wheel
Actually, I feel more like teh thread GIF kitteh…with the addition of a Simon and Garfunkle earworm careening through my brain unbidden.
That portends an ill week.
Glad that Cook’s wedding went well and that you were able to snag a BBoG afore they all disappeared.
I brung coffee:
If we are going to “doot’, I’d rather have Creedence.
“Doot, doot, doot, lookin’ out my back door.”
You might want to reconsider that; you know what else elephants do besides playing tambourines?
“You’re gonna need a bigger Rake O’ Doom…”
Good morning, Gerbil Nation!
Good morning, RabBiT and Fatwa!
Y’all are pretty talented. RabBiT can toot CCR, while Fatwa can toot Simon and Garfunkle.
“Hello darkness my old *tooooooooot!*
I’ve come to talk to you a-*pooooooooot!*”
Those sounds aren’t very silent. (And when they are, they tend to also be deadly.)
Good morning Rabbit! And Fatwa ! And Paddy!
Heya Paddy & Sven.
Well, Fatwa started it.
He goes to a religious event & we end up with a band review.
( then he pretends that he didn’t know that ALL funk bands started in church-ha)
I don’t know why y’all “beat up” on drummers. I thought it was base players that were the dumb.
“I’ve come to FFFRRPP with you again”.
Great minds think alike.
Y’all slipped in silently but deadly while I was slow-typing.
I see CNN has the COUNTDOWN to SHUTDOWN clock going. Just another day in America with DOOM waiting right around the corner.
This little tune contains no references to flatulence:
I believe I admitted knowing that many funk/R&B tropes came from church; nonetheless, hearing them for the pulpit for the first time was a bit odd. (Proving once again that “book larnin'” ain’t no substitute for life experience.)
In re drummer and bassist jokes: there are unflattering gags for nearly all musicians.
How do you tell the difference between a violinist and a dog?
The dog knows when to stop scratching.
What’s the difference between a viola and a trampoline?
You take your shoes off to jump on a trampoline.
How do you get two piccolos to play in unison?
Shoot one of the players.
What is a burning oboe good for?
Setting a bassoon on fire.
How do you make a trombone sound like a French horn?
Shove your fist into the bell and *frack* every third note.
What’s the difference between a drummer and a drum machine?
With a drum machine you only have to punch the information in once.
What’s the difference between a soprano and a piranha?
Okay…I’ll stop now.
That reminds me of the Eastman School of Music “Brown Air Cheer” which was -- and presumably still is -- spelled “BVHFR” and spoken through lightly-closed lips. It sort of helps if you also adopt the stereotypical “prissy and disapproving old person” expression. 😉
If you try speaking “BVHFR” in the recommended fashion a few times, you’ll know when you’ve got it right. 😉
Were I a betting man, I’d wager that “word” was coined by a brass player, as the proper lip position is quite similar to a trumpet / trombone / tuba / French horn embouchure:
Those guys make noise by buzzing their lips into the mouthpiece.
I played trombone for a year and remember that bzzzz only too well. You not only had to make the sound but several different versions for different notes at the same slide position.
Muscular cheeks, and NOT in the Andrew Sullivan meaning of that, Jerry!!
Being the resident prig I think the “prissy and disapproving old person” face comes naturally.
Both your avatar pic and RW demeanor belie your 2:35 comment…neener, neener, neener!
Don’t recall you ever mentioning having been ‘bone player; how did you come to choose that particular gas-powered instrument?
I wanted piano as we had one at home but the choices were limited and I think I had to pick that or a woodwind. I did not like the trombone. It did not seem like a solo instrument to me, only a support instrument. I found no outlet for expression in it. I did not like the spit or the buzzzzzZZZZZZZZZ! My lips go numb just remembering it.
I felt self conscious and foolish playing it. I would have preferred piano or violin, or even that woodwind. I knew nothing of any of this until I got into it and then I was filled with regret. I could not drop it for a year because it cost my parents money to rent the thing. I dropped it when I could. I have no talent anyway so I did not try something else. Also, the music teacher was a dick and ruined what could have been an enjoyable and educational class in music appreciation for me. I had a B- based on my grades and final exam and I had learned some enjoyable things. A bunch of people turned in extra credit papers in the last week or two and he graded on a curve so my B- moved down to a D, my first, and caused me all kinds of trouble at home. The teacher said I could have done extra credit work too if I wanted the grade but I was taking advanced courses and putting in a lot of time after school in science class so I could not afford to do a dozen extra credit papers for a one semester music course. He said that was how they graded in college and I just should have put his class first if I wanted the grade.
Between the drunken math teacher that got me behind in algebra at a critical time and this music teacher, Jr HS was a bad two years. In HS I avoided anything to do with music and while I was a year ahead in math and science classes I was missing some of the fundamentals. I was good at math and put together systems that let me get results but when I hit higher levels in Algebra II it started to come apart and calculus was out of the question. Without the higher math I hit a wall in Physics as well. I ended up flipping burgers. I took mostly college prep classes in HS and these were worthless if you did not go to college. Jr. ROTC was probably the most useful and valuable classes I took in school, I used what I learned about first aid, administration and logistics, leadership, and rules of war when I got into management. 😆
Sorry about the whine, got any cheese?
Did you see the picture of this extinct shark, supposed to be the first face?
Does anyone else think the face looks familiar?
Olive Grumpy (Extinct) Shark!
Cheers for your long post.
I did not like the trombone. It did not seem like a solo instrument to me, only a support instrument.
In classical music, that’s pretty much true.
I found no outlet for expression in it. I did not like the spit or the buzzzzzZZZZZZZZZ! My lips go numb just remembering it.
I’m sincerely saddened to hear that; it was clearly the wrong instrument for you. And that profoundly sucks.
Also, the music teacher was a dick and ruined what could have been an enjoyable and educational class in music appreciation for me.
Criminy…that ought to be a capital offense. Guess that makes me some sort of reactionary musician.
Including extra credits when grading on a curve is a total dick move, too.
…and I just should have put his class first if I wanted the grade.
Jeebus…that teacher was an entire bag of dicks.
I got screwed by two years worth of carpy math teachers in junior high; I found out years later that I wasn’t as much of an Algebra dummy as I believed. After HS Geometry, which I did reasonably well in, I did not need to take any further math to graduate, so that was it for me.
On a tangential note (heh!), I’ve just started reading a book by NY Times music critic Alex Ross called Listen To This. Ross was a strictly classical listener until he was in college; the book is a collection of essays about classical and popular music.
In the first one -- among other things -- he presented an interesting case for why concert halls became such stodgy, affectedly-hoity-toity venues starting in the late 19th Century. (It was the financial backers and upper-class much more than the composers themselves; who knew?)
I also greatly enjoyed his The Rest Is Noise: Listening To The 20th Century. You can find cheap copies at Amazon’s Marketplace. I think you might like it; I learned a lot from reading it.
Interesting discussion, guys, re: music. Liked it. I was somewhat surprised to see Mac refer to someone as a ‘dick’ which I guess mean the more vulgar elements left here have finally rubbed off on him.
Like 4 hours until DOOM. I’m excited. Dont think Ive ever even see pictures of a govt shutdown.
We were planning on getting you one for your birthday, but the timing just wasn’t right.
I’m bitterly disappointed.
As long as you’re not a bitter-clinger, ‘cuz that would make you a dingleberry, and that just wouldn’t be right.
I was somewhat surprised to see Mac refer to someone as a ‘dick’ which I guess mean the more vulgar elements left here have finally rubbed off on him.
Um, high fives? 😉
Like 4 hours until DOOM. I’m excited.
I figure that Weepy Boner will fold; he always does.
Sent the following to my Rep. today:
Dear Rob (since you’ve decided that we’re on a first name basis) --
Thanks for your courtesy of what appears to be a non-form response to my previous email.
In that response, you claimed -- regarding the NSA -- that “…the metadata program has absolutely saved American lives…”.
Yes, I know you will almost certainly claim you cannot do so under the guise of “national security”. And my rejoinder would be that for far too long, far too many elected and appointed officials -- as well as faceless bureaucrats -- have used that excuse to get away with violating the law. Nearly always to little or no consequence, save for further erosions of personal liberties. And, often, being rewarded with promotions for their malfeasance.
Which strikes me as an egregious violation of the social and legal contract between the United States government and its citizens. Based upon observation, effectively nobody in our government takes their oath to uphold and defend the Constitution with what I consider the appropriate solemnity and gravity.
While it is not a perfect document -- although it is a damned good one in its present form -- I wholeheartedly support the U.S. Constitution as I understand it. Unfortunately, it has been apparent for many years that the U.S. government from the top on down does not.
As such, the government has not had my consent for a very long time.
“Government” is an aggregate of individual people, each of whom is responsible for his or her own actions. When those persons are not held accountable for any actions which violate the law and/or our social compact, a reasonable man might seriously question the wisdom of holding-up their own end of that compact.
That same reasonable man might also have an all-too-rational fear of the men with guns and dogs who are likely to show up at their door if they persist in failing to do as the government commands, even when those commands are illegal or immoral. And that, sir, does not meet my definition of “liberty”; I feel confident that at least some of our Founders would concur.
The members of the Oversight Committee have repeatedly let highly placed officials who have demonstrably obfuscated and/or outright lied about very serious matters simply walk out of various hearings.
In your email, you stated, “I pledge to you that I will judiciously investigate all potential wrong doing.”
That apparently does not cover *actual* wrongdoing.
You also wrote, “We must get to the heart of the truth of the scandals involving members of the Obama Administration and not jump to political conclusions.”
Agreed. However, violations of the law are not “political”, they are “criminal”. Yet the Oversight Committee seems, thus far, to be permitting malefactors to stomp all over them. It would be nice if even a single person on the committee were outraged, or even ever-so-slightly vexed, and had the temerity to exhibit that to the American people.
In my opinion, assaults on the founding principles of our nation ought not be responded to with civilized, genteel parliamentary procedure and pusillanimity; they should be met in a very vigorous, forceful and unequivocal manner.
In other words: I would like to see some raw anger directed at those dissembling brigands. Does it violate some arcane, cretinous House tradition to call-out lying bastards for being lying bastards?
If so, that is a fundamental predicament which needs to change.
[Insert real name here]
I am just so furious with the folks inside the Beltway and those who do their bidding that I’ve decided to pound on my Rep. (Our U.S. Senators are utterly beyond redemption; Chambliss is out in ’15 and we’re stuck with Isakson at least until ’17.)
I’ve also decided that “f*ck you, that’s why” is a two-way street. 😉
Paddy beat me to it, Fatwa. Very nicely done.
As Popeye said, “I’ve had all I can stands and I can’t stands no more.”
Less than three hours now. Getting the popcorn ready.
And if may quote you: “When those persons are not held accountable for any actions which violate the law and/or our social compact, a reasonable man might seriously question the wisdom of holding-up their own end of that compact. ”
Bingo. Teh crux of the matter. Which no one in govt seems to quite understand.
I’m seriously considering spending about $25 to have this shirt made up:
I propose a Government Shut-down drinking game.
Every time a member of Congress says anything, take a drink.
When you pass out, you’ll temporarily forget what a bunch of worthless, carpweasels and arse-hats they are. And when you need a new liver, Obamacare will give you the false impression that you will receive one, free of charge.
“If you like your liver, you can keep your liver.”
The scene in Washington, DC:
“They looked back. Dark yawned the archway of the Gates under the mountain shadow. Faint and far beneath the earth rolled the slow drum beats: doom. A thin black smoke trailed out. Nothing else was to be seen; the dale around was empty. Doom. Grief at last wholly overcame them and they wept long: some standing and silent, some cast upon the ground. Doom, doom. The drum beats faded.”
Sad and sickening.
To Protect and Serve…Themselves.
There you go, Fatwa! BTW, Mrs Sven gave your letter two thumbs up.
Like 45 minutes to go….
Thank you, Mrs. Sven!
30 minutes. The NHL season starts tomorrow; I hope they’ll find a way to still play without all those furloughed govt workers on the job.
Kings season starts Wednesday. And thank god too; I’ve had about all I can take of the Oakland Raiders.
Doom. And oh yeah: quarter round.
Is it DOOM yet?
Die, Dingy Harry, DIE!!!!
Q: What’s the difference between terrorists and the U.S. Senate?
A: You can negotiate with terrorists.
Hello? Hello? Are you guys still there??? Hello?
Oh well, so it goes. Enjoy every sandwich.
Good night friends.
“It will be of little avail to the people, that the laws are made by men of their own choice, if the laws be so voluminous that they cannot be read, or so incoherent that they cannot be understood; if they be repealed or revised before they are promulgated, or undergo such incessant changes that no man, who knows what the law is to-day, can guess what it will be to-morrow.”
— Alexander Hamilton
He must have read Obamacare.