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Rabbit
Editor
Rabbit
8 years ago

O grabbin’ greetings!

Paddy O'Furnijur
Editor
Paddy O'Furnijur
8 years ago

A blessed Sabbath, Gerbil Nation!
Good morning, RabBiT!

We’re going to break out the Christmas tree this afternoon, then decorate it on Monday. It’s a bit early this year, but with the first Sunday of Advent following right on the heels of Thanksgiving this year it’s the only time we’ve got. Teh Younger comes home in ten days -- it will be nice to have him home. He hasn’t been home since the first week of August.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist
Editor

G’day, GN!
Hai, RabBeet & Paddy!

Well…I’m relieved that all of the problems with teh Il DoucehyCare website have been resolved and that we’ll all be able to get better, cheaper policies now. And we look forward to keeping that $2,500 / year in our pockets.

Plus no worries about the security of our personal data anymore. Yay technocrats! Three cheers for kindly, caring and competent Big Government!

Sven 2-0
Editor
Sven 2-0
8 years ago

It was a predictable response. However the damn thing is working on Dec 1, declare victory and move on.

The only thing worse than LoLCats is this administration.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist
Editor

The Mall of America would seem to be owned by a consortium of Scrooge Industries LLC and GrinchCo:

Serge Vorobyov — who goes by the YouTube handle “Serge the Car Hauler” — threw $1,000 in dollar bills from the fourth floor of the Mall of America rotunda as a choir performed “Let it Snow” on the ground floor below.

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Unfortunately, Bloomington police did not share his vision of yuletide cheer. They arrested him and charged him with disorderly conduct.

A Mall of America spokesperson said his antics could have caused a major disturbance and someone could have been hurt.

Mall authorities also announced the shuttering of the Corn Dog Factory franchise in the Food Court because, “they represent a choking hazard for children. Plus, someone could poke their eye out with the stick. And don’t even get me started on the menace of Orange Julius ‘brain freeze’.”

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist
Editor

Today’s vocabulary word is German: kummerspeck -- weight gained from emotional overeating. Literally “grief bacon”.

Mmmmmmmmm… grief bacon.

Paddy O'Furnijur
Editor
Paddy O'Furnijur
8 years ago

‘Grief bacon’ is your schadenfriend.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist
Editor

Hah!

Lurve that; might I respectfully suggest modifying it slightly to schadenfreunde?

(Kann mir nicht helfen; Ich bin eine Grammatik-Nazi.) 😉

Sven 2-0
Editor
Sven 2-0
8 years ago

That’s a good word. I like it.

Sven 2-0
Editor
Sven 2-0
8 years ago

Good evening guys!

It’s been a couple of days of suck followed by not-suck for me.

Me and Mrs Sven went away for the weekend--that didnt suck, but now it’s back to work tomorrow. That sucks.

We went up north to the Indian ca*ino. A couple of hours in at the video p*ker machines, I’ve lost almost all my stake. That game use to be my game; for years I played and always made money. The last two years, not so much, and Saturday was no exception. That sucked, but OK, I’ll sneak over to the ATM and reload. But now my card doesnt work. Upon further inspection, I realize it expired in October and the new ATM card got left at home on the side table. That really sucked and now I’m left with a couple of hundred bucks left in my pocket and no cheap easy way to get more.

So I sit at this awful card game, Mississippi Stud, which is kinda the flip side version of Let it Ride and buy in with the last of my stake. With this game, you ante up and get two cards and the dealer gets three community cards. You look at your cards and if you like them, you bet 1-3X your ante. If you don’t like them, you toss them and lose your ante. The dealer turns over the community cards one at a time and you can bet or fold at each step.

So I get dealt a pair of 8s. It’s not a winning hand but it’s at least a push so I bet the max on all 3 spots, $15 each, and tuck the cards. The dealer turns over an 8. That doesnt suck as now I do have a winning hand with trips. Then the dealer turns over a second 8 and now it really really doesnt suck as I hit quads and a 40:1 payout: $2000 and now my earlier losses are wiped out and I’m way ahead. A further not suck: no taxes or paperwork on this win.

There’s about a 15-minute delay in the game as they review the security video to make sure I didnt cheat and then they pay me off. The very next hand, Mrs Sven is dealt two 8s. The dealer turns over the third 8 and we are both thinking how cool (and suspicious) would this be if she hit the 4th 8? Doesnt happen, but the three-of-a-kind pays off nicely for her.

We play some 21 later on that doesnt suck either and make a few bucks. And the next morning, we decide not to play anymore, but to take our winnings and leave early before the traffic starts up.

So now some more suck. We get down off the mountain and blow through Santa Barbara. Traffic is great--the 101 is moving right along--but around Montecito, I pick up this tailgater. For a good 7-8 miles this guy is right on my ass and I’m in the slow lane doing 70. Slowing down doesnt do any good--tapping the brakes doesnt do any good. This guy is just glued to me and it’s making me nervous especially since I can see that the guy is one of those rather oblivious drivers. Anyhow, maybe not the smartest move in retrospect, but I’d been eating this beef jerky and there’s a good size piece left, so I roll down my window, signal my intention to this guy, and toss it backwards into his windshield. It’s a piece of jerky so it it isnt going to do any damage, but he’s so close that it does hit his windshield right in front of his face. That slows him down and now he finally changes lanes to pass me with I’m sure will be righteous indignation. He pulls up next to me--some dweebly looking college kid--and I flip him off. I guess he didnt like my looks cuz he slowed back down and we never saw him again. So that didnt suck at all and we made it the rest of the way home just fine.