Shhhhhhhh! (Conspiracy Theory Captions Thread)

Tonight, a study in the esoteric realms of international diplomacy.

Behind a facade of seemingly innocent captioning, it’s time to examine our own International Woman of Mystery; the woman behind the Bengazi Bamboozle… the woman who masterminded the Rose Law Firm Shuffle… the woman who directed the Vince Foster Obfuscation…

She's got lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll's eye...
Not a Sith Overlord…as far as you know.

That’s right, it’s Hillary! The world is a slippery place, and we can only guess at what our omnipresent Sec State has in store for us — and for the world. Don your tinfoil attire and hoist your conspiracy flag high; it’s time to CAPTION THAT!

69 Comments
Oldest
Newest
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago

Do these two crowns make me look maniacal?

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago

FIRST! Damn straight I first.

Paddy O'Furnijur
Editor
10 years ago

The reason Bill lives in Harlem.

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago

Monica was a piker! I can get a whole box of Cubans in there!

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago
Reply to  BrendaK

I’m goin’ for the win.

Just Sven
Editor
10 years ago

Madame President.

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago

Speaking of which, May 6th begins the “International Clitoris Awareness Week”. I’ve checked and I’m pretty sure I don’t have one.

Just Sven
Editor
10 years ago
Reply to  BrendaK

Hope you are OK Brenda. But guilting a Joooooo? Can that be done?

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago
Reply to  BrendaK

Awww, and I always wanted to be the one to bang-you-up. Still, I hope you’re OK.

Just Sven
Editor
10 years ago

Why yes, I am standing on Bill’s balls.

Just Sven
Editor
10 years ago

Chelsea isnt really my daughter-she’s my clone.

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago

What does it matter after all?

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago

No, those are NOT vaginal warts on my mouth. Really. They’re not.

Just Sven
Editor
10 years ago

And then I told Bill, hell if you can find the car keys you can just drive on out of here!

Just Sven
Editor
10 years ago

I will f*ck you hard like a teacher.

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago

Oh, Bill send in an intern, I want to lay some carpet real bad.

Just Sven
Editor
10 years ago
Reply to  BrendaK

Sorry, I had to check my hummers.

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago

Sorry, I’ll try harder. My snark-o-matic seems to be on the fritz.

Just Sven
Editor
10 years ago

Damn straight you are going to need a bigger boat.

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago

I’m told that I’m just beautiful by those whose salaries I pay.

Just Sven
Editor
10 years ago

And tomorrow I’ll tell the entire country that it’s their turn in the barrel.

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago

The first thing I’m going to do as President is to have the underside of the desk cleaned!

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago
Reply to  BrendaK

Yeah, wonder if he’ll have the nerve to come out before his term is over? Calling Reggie Love?

Just Sven
Editor
10 years ago

Well Ive hit a wall.

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago
Reply to  Just Sven

Isn’t that BrendaK(lutz)’s job?

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

The first thing I’m going to do as President is to have the underside of the desk cleaned!

Does that have anything to do with International Clitoris Awareness Week?

Maaaaan…teh local Waffle House was hoppin’ this evening!

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

Teh thread pic reminds me of teh surface of Uranus…except for teh teeth.

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago

Not mine. I swear.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

You mean not your teeth?

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago

I’ve been advised by my lawyer not to comment on that.

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago
Reply to  BrendaK

You’ve never been more sexy to me as you are right now.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist
Reply to  BrendaK

Yes, that’s right. I’m threatening the lot of you.

That way, they can see teh merry hell I face every. Single. Day.

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago

Vince Foster. John Foster Dulles. Stephen Foster. What does it matter at this point?

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

Pic caption: Vagina Dentata.

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago

Winner by a stretch.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

Or Foster Brooks.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

Four minute warning!

Kate
Editor
Kate
10 years ago

Ack! Teh perssure!

Kate
Editor
Kate
10 years ago

“Bwahaha! the Power. It is all mine!”

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago
Reply to  Kate

Hi Katie!

Kate
Editor
Kate
10 years ago

Hey, Jerrie! when are you going to claim your prize in Happy Larryville?

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

Hi, K8!

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago

See, my badonk a donk looks just like my face.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

But(t) bigger.

Kate
Editor
Kate
10 years ago

Hey Fatwa!

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist
Reply to  Kate

Hope you had a good crowd…especially since a couple o’ gerbils couldn’t be arsed to show up.

Kate
Editor
Kate
10 years ago

About 15. More couples this time which was very nice.

Kate
Editor
Kate
10 years ago
Reply to  BrendaK

No problem, BrendaK(lutz). I missed you, but was kept pretty busy with my experiment -- Chicken Fajita Horns -- so I wouldn’t have been able to talk with you much. I hope you are recovering.

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

And…time’s up!

Fatwa Arbuckle: Misanthropologist

NEW THREAD ZOMG!!!!!!!!!

Barrett Wellman(tm)
Editor
10 years ago

Kate and BrendaK. How do you plan to celebrate International Clitoris Awareness Week. Be as specific as possible. Spare no detail.

Kate
Editor
Kate
10 years ago

I will have to think on that. I wonder if PMK has made any plans . . .